Well I guess I just did not have the strength to hold on anymore. There was one topic that I wanted to talk to him about and it would determine what was going to happen to our marriage. He is active duty military and he made out a living will that says if both of us die his mom gets the kids!! This was not discussed with me and it hurt that he would have no consideration of my feelings at all. I am my kids mom and I have a right to say what would happen to my children if something was to happen to me.
So one night we were all in a good upbeat mood and I asked him “Can we set up a date and time to go work on the living will?” He asked me “why”? I said because I want to be able to have a say in what happens to my children is something was to happen to us both. Oh he flew off the handle and started calling me an F****** B****!!! Also the kids are in the back of the car while he decides to blow up like this over a simple question and me wanting to be able to play a part in the decisions for our kids.
My son who was in the back of the car (he is 7 yrs old) said to his dad. “Dad that is not nice of you to talk to mom that way!” He turned around and said “If you are married to a F****** B****, then you call her a F****** B****!” I pulled over a block away from our house and I said that is it, I am done!! GET OUT OF THE CAR!! He went off on the car and actually broke the passenger car door. His drinking, anger, verbal abuse and physical abuse has escalated now that he is not in the house. Due to me calling the MPs on him with the car door thing he is not allowed in or around the house without the proper command with him. He decided to break this rule and he ended up pushing me to the ground and smacked me in the face. Again he is doing this in front of the kids.
The kids and I are packing to move home to TX to be with family and I will start the legal separation and divorce there but will file in VA. I am going after him for child support, alimony, health insurance, part of this life insurance and retirement pay. I have been a stay home mom for years and I am going to take him for all I can possibly get!
I just go the 72 hour protection order extended to a 15 day and on the 24th of Oct I go in to go before a judge to ask for a 2 year. This protection order is for the kids and myself.
Just wanted to give you an update on what happened. There are times when I do wish that we could work it out but for my kids safety I am going to just stay apart.
I wish all of you luck with your mother-in-laws!! Now if he would just run home to mommy and never come near us again, things would be wonderful!!
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5 Responses to “UPDATE RE: On The Edge Of Divorce”
OMG! I was reading your story then luckily underneath your story there was the story you posted in August underneath “Articles related to this one” … I’m no shrink or anything but it sounds to me ignorance runs in the family, isssssssues lol. The MIL insults you, now her son is aggressive around you? Get out before it gets worse. You did the right thing, you and your children need to be safe. He sounds like a PRICK talking to you like that infront of your children. I don’t even want to talk about him abusing you…… guys like that really bother me, I hope he’s miserable. Never look back!
Hello there,
First of all I want to say that I feel sorry for you and I want to say that you really did NOT deserve this. Like you said in your first message 8 years of insults.. you sacrificed a lot lady! Do not excuse or appologize anymore now, you’ve been done with that. Also now that you got here with the real seperation and everything just think about whats best for you and your kids. I’m curious if he will come back to you or that he’ll leave it like this. If he decides to come and talk with you then please let him make the appologizes and all the making up work. Thats not your job cause you did that already for 8 years, now its his time. You can ask or force him things that you want in order for him to come back. Be clear right from the beginning if you decide to take him back and do not ever let his mom come between you. You can give him 1 more chance if he blews it well sorry but you gotta think about yourself. If he cannot do that than very sorry said its not the right man or in this case boy for you. Cause you’re right, he is not a man if he doesn’t stand up for your feelings, nothing but a child.
Let us know what happends please, for now I wish you all the best and very much luck cause you are going to a hard time if it comes to divorce and everything.
Greets and a huggle from Judith (europe so my English sucks sorry)
Good luck to you! You are doing the right thing. Do not put up with this bully or his crazy bitch momma.
You are in my thoughts. I know how hard this is, and you are being such a good mom. I remember what turned the key for me was the counselor telling me that I had an obligation to show my daughter that this is NOT how a woman should be treated. Stay together for the sake of the kids? NO WAY! Not when it’s teaching them how to ruin their lives.
You are a strong woman, doing the right thing, and that makes you a great mom. Lean on God, it isn’t His will for family to be this way either.
I respect and admire you.
GOD BLESS U U R IN MY THOUGHTS I AM SO SORRY THIS MAN PREFERS HIS DOG OF A MOM TO THE PEARL OF A WIFE YOUR STORY SHARES WITH US MOVE ON W UR LIFE AND GOOD LUCK