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Daughters in Law... don’t suffer in silence!

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My husbands mother is profoundly lonely and profoundly unhappy woman, that was her official diagnosis from the doctors. When I met her, it was apparent that my husband already had a wife in his mother, as she was unhappy with her husband she substituted her son and they lived an emotionally incestuous relationship as husband and wife for many years. Well there is good reason that she is profoundly lonely, and I get that that stems from her profound unhappiness.

So WW3 broke out when I stole her son from her and her life since the day that we got together has been nothing but attempt after attempt to break up our marriage and win her son back. We argue about her constantly and the emotionally incestuous marriage between her and my husband has been rekindled since her husband died. Not as strong as it once was but now marred with this "could be her last day" bit, which we have been going through since 2008.

Right now she is in the final stages of her life, I have no idea how much time she has left but about every few months she goes into the hospital for organ failure, so I think the end could be near but then she amazes us with what she survives so who knows. My husband is dealing with this by pampering her. I know these times are self created, she stops taking her medicine at around a grandchild's birthday in order to steal the child's thunder by trying to make herself the center of attention, we get the call with the shaky quivering voice every time usually right on the grandchild's birthday, how can each time be this coincidental?

Each time she goes in, all I can do is pray that this is the last time, but low and behold each and every time the horrific old woman comes out as good as new, usually in about three days. The hardest part if I were to be honest is all the energy that we have to expend saving her when she pulls these stunts and we have to, if we don't we could be in trouble, so we do everything we can to help. Take her to the hospital, my husband is even her prescription delivery boy now just to show that we have done all we can to try and coerce her into taking her stupid medicine, he goes over each and every day to take care of this horrific creature and I can't say a darn thing about it, just bite my tongue and pray for peace from her. My prayers go unanswered each and every time. It is as if she is supernaturally protected by Satan himself.

The best way I can explain it is imagine having cancer, but having to keep the cancer going, the cancer must be protected and you must do everything you can if the cancer is about to go into remission to bring it back, so you take the cancer to the cancer emergency where the staff works hard to save the cancer and in three days the cancer is back as strong as ever and you get to suffer more. You really wish the cancer would go away as it is causing extreme pain but the laws protect the cancer, you have to instead prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that you did all you could to keep it going, and pamper it too.

Sounds like my mil except mine is still young and not ill!! Damn!! But guess what I laid it out straight to him in the most honest way. Trust me he didn't like it and then I told her she needed to quit her . She did. Ha but I still don't trust her

Anonymous commented 2 years ago

Can we chat soon sometimes? My email us

Anonymous commented 2 years ago

Hi there,

I saw your post and am very interested in speaking with you about your story. Would love to chat when you can. Please email me at

Anonymous commented 2 years ago

I wouldn't usually say something so cold like this, but shes dead soon and she envy's your life. Death is awaiting for her, lets hope it doesn't linger. She needs to be taken out of her misery.

IEM commented 2 years ago

Your cancer analogy is brilliant.

Mary commented 2 years ago

I'm so sorry, this sounds like a nightmare. Hopefully she'll finally depart soon and leave you in peace.

Cat commented 2 years ago

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daughters in law, don’t suffer in silence!