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Daughters in Law... don’t suffer in silence!

If you are looking for a place to find support, seek advice, laugh a bit, and maybe resolve your mother-in-law issues, look no further!
At Mother-in-Law Hell you can swap MIL stories, give & get advice, and so much more. Join the Daughters-in-Law Sisterhood!
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I am so glad that I have found this website!!! I have been married for just over three years. My husband and I have been together just over four years. My mother-in-law basically is on a pedestal in everyone's eyes. She has this way of controlling people because no one wants to upset her. It is so hard to explain how horrible she can be to me without even saying much. What makes it worse is I feel like my marriage has been one big competition for my husbands love. I do not want him to not have a relationship with his mother, but is it too much to know that i matter to him? That I come first in his life? She even talks to him and calls him Babe like a wife should. And I am always made out to be the bitch because she cries if I stand up for myself. Sometimes I wonder if my marriage is even worth fighting for if she is going to be at the center not me.... Any advice?

My MIL's 4 kids are also all afraid to upset her. It's such BS she gets to get away with everything just because she's the almighty matriarch. Then us in laws just try to defend ourselves and we're the "disrespectful" ones!

Jill commented 2 years ago

My Husband and I have been married 6 years and his mom still calls him Babe, I'm not sure why, it's freaking weird as hell! The best thing I can tell you is talk directly to your MIL. It feels weird and like that should be your husbands job but in retrospect it's normally the woman who runs the household and so you have to create boundaries. I've told my MIL countless times what's okay and what isn't. I think certain mothers think they still need to "mother" even after their sons are married, you just need to put your foot down and say no. Also don't worry about the competition part, your husband loves both you and his mother, however he loves you in a much more different way than he does his mother, and on top his mom probably feels like she's lost him, so even though she might think she's competing you shouldn't have to. Sorry if that was kind of rambling but hopefully that helps!

Aubrey commented 3 years ago

I can relate to both of you. My monster in law is no longer welcome in my home because of the misery she's caused. She convinced ask but 3 of good family members to not come to our wedding because I was making him get married and beating him... To she's light on how crazy this is my husband is in the military and could kick my so bad it's unreal... I on the other hand can't even throw a punch. Ignoring her, talking to her, confronting her nothing send to help. Even counselors seem stunned when we explain how she chased me out of the house screaming. I hate to hear you ladies are going through it to so I can get it out to someone who understands.

Danielle commented 3 years ago

I can definitely relate to this. My mother-in-law is extremely controlling as well. I found out today (with two days notice) that my in-laws are planning on visiting for Valentine's Day weekend. At first I tried to make the best of it. Then I began thinking of how this is yet another boundary violation that is about to push our marriage over the edge. We have spoken to four therapists about the damage she has done to our marriage. I ended screaming "I'm leaving!" slamming the door and driving off without a destination until I decided to drive to the chapel to pray. My husband ended up finding me there. He must have had the same idea after our fight.

I would say more but I am almost paranoid that she has spies monitoring this site and will figure out who I am!

Sobbing commented 3 years ago

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daughters in law, don’t suffer in silence!