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Daughters in Law... don’t suffer in silence!

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The stress couldn't get any much worst. I'm dealing with a husband who refuses to move out from his mom's house. So at the moment, we live in my mother in law's house. I have a 10 yr old son who has encopresis, he often soils his pants. While exerting alot of effort to help him overcome this, i have to deal with my MIL commanding me how to raise my kids, telling me how to handle them everytime, and making me feel how bad of a mom I am when I do not do what she tells me to. When the husband wants to do something for me ,she bitches and fights with him in front of me, the tension just bothers me everytime. And while in the sideline i try to tell my husband not to yell at her because she is his mom, she on the other hand tries to find some mistakes I did in parenting to put me in a bad light to my husband. She couldn't find anything else against me because I stay home all the time, do not party, take care of the kids and clean the house. She continually tries to get his favor like she is competing with me, questioning my decisions and the way I do things. She's got my husband's checkbook and one time when my husband told her to give me the checkbook so I can write checks for the kids' bills in school, she refused to give me the checkbook and just wrote me one check instead. When a mail contains mine and my husband's name, she unapologetically opens it. My husband told me to call his job when I get the letter for insurance but I never got it, she took it and just told my husband when he got home. When my husband told her I was supposed to call his job when I get the letter, she says, "well why don't i do this or that....", she basically wanted to be the wife, doing stuff for him. One time I ordered my daughter's birth certificates online . I never received them. After awhile I found out she hid them from me when they came from the mail. When I finally couldn't take it and went home to my mom with my 2 kids, my boys' SSN went missing. She also didn't let me go home unless I surrender my wedding ring, and she asked to get the title of the car that was on my husband and mine's name. When me and my husband made up and I came back here, I found out she took the ssn's of my kids out of my purse. Help, my husband couldn't see how evil she has been and I am still forced to live with her vindictiveness and manipulation. I love my husband, but I cannot live like this anymore. I try to talk to my husband all the time but he either refuses to talk about it all the time, or is too busy to talk. i do not know what to do anymore.

A husband should take his wife's and kid's side no matter what. You are his family and he should go wherever you go and not let his mother get in the way of your happiness. It's even in the wedding vowels that no one should come between these two people. And she is. You're probably too kind and gentle with her and that won't stop her bullshit. Gather your evidence, plan to sit down and talk with your husband, explain exactly what's going on and ask for his point of view. Paint him a picture of what it's like for you. Make sure this is away from the house and in a nice private area. Why does he need her to live with you guys? Is there a reason that you're not seeing? If you absolutely cannot get out of there you'll need to set some boundaries that if are crossed will result in her having to leave. It'll be less hurtful to the mother in law if he tells her this instead of you. If nothing works after talking with your husband calmly and explaining what is happening, setting boundaries and whatnot then you'll need to send her packing. It's not fair that you'll have to leave your home because of one woman. Tell her to pack her bags and that she is no longer welcome. It'll be healthier and less stressful on you, if he is a true man he will understand your reasons.

Cathleen commented 12 months ago

You need to leave. Your ten year olds issues may well be due to having to live in that house. Meanwhile have all mail forwarded to your parents house and report her mail theft. Tell your husband to grow up and move out with you or you will move without him.

Opal commented 12 months ago

Messing with someone's mail is a federal offense! Fight back, get the proof you need and do something about it. This crazy b* has power over you because you let her.

I totally get the creepy mother-son relationship. My husband's mother also has some sort of twisted hold on him but your monster-in-law makes mine look like a saint. That's saying a lot.

Anonymous commented 12 months ago

Pleas run as fast as you can. You are married to your husband and his Mother. Report her for stealing your mail and things out of your purse. Your husband does not and will not put you or your family first. I'm s sorry but you have no marriage and need to get your children and leave.

Tracy commented 1 year ago

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daughters in law, don’t suffer in silence!