If you can help it, don’t marry your friend’s brother. You just might end up hating her after you are related. My SIL and I went to HS together and that is how I met my husband. I could tell my SIL wasn’t crazy about the idea but never really said much to me about it. Over time though, I realized she was trying to break us up in small ways. She told me that her brother slept around a lot. He was always picking up women from bars. She then told him that I was a man hater. Luckily future hubby and I talked about this. We had a good laugh because neither story was true.
My SIL moved out of state and hubby and I did fine for 5 yrs. SIL was pretty wild and never came home much. Hubby and I married and things seemed to be ok with SIL. We would talk on the phone occasionally but she would try to make me feel bad for getting married. I wasn’t living she would say. She moved back home, met a man and also got married. After so many yrs of not being friends anymore, she started to reach out to me. We started to do thing together like the old days. Our lives have some common purpose now since she was done whoring around and doing drugs.
When she got pregnant with her first child we became a lot closer. I had a child by this time and I took her around to all the great baby stores I had found. We shopped for cribs, talked babies and it really felt great after all these years we connected again. I still felt some reserve on our relationship because SIL is very manipulative. I had thought maybe she had grown up. I always felt older than her.
During this time hubby and I bought a new house. I still thought everything was really good between us. She had her baby shower coming up and I was helping my other SIL’s and MIL with it. Out of the blue my FIL who also likes to start stuff told my husband that my SIL was at his house telling him that I was ruining her brother’s life. How I had to have the best of everything. How my kitchen is full of expensive stainless steel appliances. This was kind of funny cuss the house we bought was an estate sale. The previous owners had put in a stainless steel cook top and oven that were from the 70’s. But what really hurt is why would she say I was ruining my husband’s life? After constant push and pull with her, I decided that I simply couldn’t be her friend anymore. It went through the grapevine that I had heard about the comments. Immediately my MIL and other SIL’s got defensive with me. They asked me if I was helping with the shower still. Since they had an attitude and I was hurt over the comments I said no. I would attend but that was it. I will full fill the family obligation. So this caused a war. My SIL told my MIL to cancel her shower cuss she has no friends now and sees no point in having a shower. Since this SIL is the baby of the family, everyone got angry with me. SIL had a shower anyway and since everyone felt sooo sorry for her, my step MIL threw her a second shower. So not only did I have to go to the first one, I had to go the second.
That was 8 yrs ago and things are still rocky. SIL and I fake being nice to each other but when I leave, SIL says nasty things. She gets my MIL riled up and I can always tell where it stemmed from. They are really transparent. Last xmas my SIL told my MIL that I didn’t eat. My MIL gets defensive if no one eats her food. I always eat cuss she is a good cook even though I don’t like the woman. So before we got in the door, MIL was ringing our phone saying why didn’t your wife eat?! What was her problem? Its really petty stuff. MY SIL is always making sure there is some sort of riff so they are on her side all the time. All of it so petty and I cant believe a grown woman in her late 30’s feels the need to start such petty spats. All of the remind of a mean click in high school. Got to hate someone all the time.
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