My MIL is not THAT bad. Or perhaps I have a high tolerance, I’m not exactly sure which it may be. I remember one of the first nights we had dinner at her house before my husband and I were married and she was talking to me about how thin I was (I’m naturally a smaller person) and then asked me if I’d ever thought about getting breast implants. At the time I laughed it off, but later realized how inappropriate that comment was. My husband told me to just ignore her when she says things like that, that she is jealous because she has always had weight issues. (?)
Anyway, 7 years later and now my husband and I are married and I’m currently pregnant with our first child. I’ve dealt with many, MANY comments along those lines and even worse and I’m now just hitting my “no more tolerance” level.
More examples: When we were away on our honeymoon his mother and sisters were supposed to watch our cats. We came back and they were both missing. We found one luckily (emaciated) but never the other. The same thing happened with our dog on another occasion but luckily a neighbor found her and brought her back. (this brings up the important question of-how am I supposed to feel okay about leaving our baby alone with her??)
She takes a lot of prescriptive drugs and starts drinking fairly early on. Gets extremely obnoxious and bickers constantly with her husband. Makes rude comments, etc This is during family functions. (Another reason I have trust issues regarding leaving our child with her-how can she safetly babysit if she’s drunk and loopy?)
Of course I could go on and on about her odd and sometimes hurtful remarks. To be fair she can be very nice at times and tries hard at others. It can be VERY hard to deal with her though-she is just a difficult person for most to handle.
Anyway, there’s my story. If anyone has any advice on how to handle an iffy MIL with your child, I’m all ears. Also, how do I stop keeping my mouth shut and start sticking up for myself without causing major family issues?
Thanks!:)
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5 Responses to “Illogical, Difficult, Negative,Opinionated”
My MIL is a nut who loves to try and give my children dangerous toys (for their age levels) and wants to put them up on her shoulders (she is in her 70’s and very petite) sooooo — I just NEVER EVER leave my children with her, or in her care. If she is there, I am there. Period. I’d never trust her with them as she has never given me a good reason to — only a lot of bad ones. Do NOT let you MIL alone with your baby or you will be sorry, and she won’t really care if something bad happens.
I had the same issue with my SIL. I love her, she is a good person but has an issues. The way she raised her children was beyond dysfunctional but one time, hubby and I decided to let her watch our son because we had to get our drivers licenses and plates (our bday’s are two days apart) so instead of taking our new baby to the sec. of state, we let his crazy sister watch our son. We figured an hour wouldnt hurt. We came back and our son was playing with a prescription bottle. My crazy SIL actually put one of her oxy coton pills in a bottle and gave it to him like it was a rattle! We freaked out of course and she kept saying “what? Its child proof.” So that was it. Anytime she asked to babysit, we made up excuses that someone else was watching our son blah blah. After many yrs of this she got the hint.
My MIL/FIL are just like this — crazy — shaking a pill box full of dangerous heart meds inches from my twins’ faces like it was a rattle. And then they wonder why I get upset? Some people can just never be left alone with a baby/child…no matter what!
OK…she’s an aloholic. That is a very typical discription “fine one minute, jerk the next” (to paraphrase.
If they can’t be bothered to toss some food down for your pets what makes you think they will be anymore responsible with your child? DO NOT leave that child alone with her ever.
Follow your instincts! When in doubt, don’t do it.