future mother-in-law has done everything in her power to break up my wedding and succeeded in doing so but only temporary. Our original wedding date was cancelled and now we are planning on eloping.He has since,stopped talking to his mother but she insists that I’m not right for him. I have children from a previous relationship and she DOES NOT approve. She loved me at first but has issues letting her children go, one child eloped the other told her to pound sand and married the girl anyway. It’s so bad the FMIL refuses to let her husband talk to his family. The lady makes up crazy stories, lies, pretends to be someone else, got our phone, cable and electricity shut off by impersonating my future husband. And then tells my future husband that I’m the liar. We have the proof of all her tricks and when he doesn’t do what she wants she threatens him again. She’ll drop stuff, say she was wrong when he says he’s done with her but as soon as he doesn’t call her for like a week, she calls him with another threat.
This post was submitted by goingcrazyinma.
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7:02 am
It makes you wonder, how can these mothers be so possessive and obsess over the fact they aren’t getting ALL the attention. How far do you live from her? How far away can ya’ll get? Get as far away as possible. If your fiance quit talking to her on his own, that is, you didn’t issue an ultimatum or otherwise get him to do it, then he loves you the way he should. Unless he goes back to talking to her. She will always come up with new schemes and tricks. One of my husband’s brothers broke it off with his mother and unfortunately, his daddy never got to see him but two or three times before he passed away a couple months ago. She is so evil, and so selfish, that she kept him from seeing his son. And he let her. He’s no better than her because he let her come between them. She was wrong and Loy, the brother, took up for his wife. He was angry that she had the nerve to behave toward his wife that way. He ran her off and told her what a sorry mother she’s always been and never backed down. I wish my husband would do the same. He’s sick of her, but she knows he loves his Daddy and that’s how she keeps her evil claws in him. I’ve been with my husband, counting the 7 e1/2 yrs we went together because she wouldn’t sign for him to get married to me. I wasn’t right for him either. anyway, we’ve been married since 1969. It’s not a good marriage and she’s a big reason. What kind of threats does she make? She’s ruining your life. The only way to win is to let her win. If he won’t step up and be a man and defend you, then ya’ll will never be happy. You CAN live without him. But, maybe ya’ll can move far away and see how that works. Her threats are scare tactics. He’s going to have to call her bluffs. She won’t hurt herself. If she can hurt you, then you need to break it off. Life isn’t always fair. I wish you luck. She will never give up until your fiance calls her on it and makes her stop it. If he won’t, then you and your children really need to move on. Your kids need to come first. They don’t need a mother who is always upset and can’t really function because the FMIL RULES her emotions. you are no better than her if you let her control your emotions. Your children may understand, but they still lose. Everyone loses with a MIL like her.
5:19 pm
Thanks for the advice. She lives pretty close to us within 45 minutes. My future husband has stepped up and defended me but at the same time he is trying to keep the peace also. But I can say that he has no contact with her except to say if you can’t accept her and the fact she’s a part of my life and will be my wife in a week, then I can’t let you be part of our life. He has made this decison all by himself at first I told him give it a few months and try to talk to her again and maybe by then she’ll accept it. But it’s hard to try to encourage him to talk to her when the woman drives me nuts. We originally split up 3 months ago(just 6 weeks before our wedding), after 2 long months and calling off the orignal date, I decided that I would give him another chance because I believe that he does really love me. Once the FMIL found out we were bak together that’s when she pulled all her CRAP. Since then he was invited to a party but his mother requested that he come without me. He put his foot down and said if I was not welcome he would not attend either. Needless to say, the wedding is on again and we could not be happier. I really believe that absence makes the heart grow. And I believe that one day she is going to realize what a huge mistake she has made. I have no regrets, I have done nothing to the woman except to love her son.
9:55 am
I’m afraid you’re fmil will not change…in fact i think it will only get worse in time especially once you’ve have kids. Living far away from her wouldn’t help either. My MIL lives in a different country but since we had kids, she comes 2 or 3 times a year and these days she even stays for 8 mos. of course we don’t let her stay with us for all those months, she actually rents a place. Nevertheless, having her around town is too taxing and stressful. Anyway, goodluck to you. i really feel for you. I’m just glad that your future husband is on your side. Just make sure that he stays that way.
10:15 pm
RUN!! RUN RUN RUN! Find a new man or your life will be HELL
7:15 am
I was naive enough to think love conquered all. I’ve been dealing w/ mother-in-law issues for 20 years, and it just gets worse. Unless you totally write her off she will always be involved somehow someway. Even if your husband sticks up for you you will have to deal w/ her always and he will end up resenting you for him not having a relationship. Then if you have kids it gets even worse. My mother-in-law has ruined our marriage and my husband not sticking up for me has made it worse, and we still don’t know if our marriage will survive. From day one I saw signs, but didn’t get out. I’m glad I didn’t because we have wonderful children, but the stress and the havoc it has caused our lives and marriage cannot be fixed. Find someone whose family loves you and wants you there. Marriage should last a life-time, do you really want to deal w/ this for the next 20-30 years???????
7:52 pm
Well girls, I am very happy to let you know that I have married the love of my life. Any attempt that my crazy mother in law has made to stop the wedding has not worked. My now MIL can now decide if she would like to be a part of OUR lives. My marriage is forever and all her tricks and antics didn’t work. I have no doubt that she will live her life in misery. I can forgive but I will never forget. And it is up to her son who still wants nothing to do with her. She has to live with that , not me.
7:57 pm
my husband and i have been married for nearly 5 years now. i had kinda the same situation as you do. my mom in law isnt quite as vengeful as yours. she is a hypicritical jesus freak. by this i mean she is just down right a terrible person, i dont think i know anyone in our small town she gets along with, but she thinks she doesnt have to take her meds or any responsibility for her actions because jesus told her not to. the week before our wedding, we actually got into a fist fight and she called everyone in my husbands family and told them not to come to our wedding. then she showed up anyways and forced me to put his sister who is just as bad back into the wedding right in the middle of our rehearsel dinner! so i had to add agroomsman and a bridesmaid and flowers….etc the morning of my wedding! my advice to you is either go ahead and elope! i was ready to. thankfully everything for my wedding turned out beautiful….if you think you can pull it off, do it without her! one day she will realize she screwed up and you will end up on the top of the power struggle. just hold your ground and stay strong!