So the story begins years ago when I met my wife in New York. We dated for 1 year long distance and then I moved her from Minneapolis to New York. Her mother happened to be in New York and my place was very small at the time so, she moved in with her mother, who had an extra room at the time. This was supposed to be a short term arrangement. Her mother kept saying she wanted to move back to China and she would leave in a few months.
Boy was I in for a suprise. We got engaged shortly after that and my wife told her mother that we’d find our own place. What a mistake. Her mother threw a major fit (kind of like a toddler) and kept saying how we dont love her and we’re so selfish that we couldn’t take care of our elderly. She broke down crying (which I didn’t buy) but my now wife couldn’t stand it. After a few days, the compromise was that we would all move into a big place and that her mother would leave in a few months (you’ll see a pattern forming)
We’ve now been married 2 years, and her mother is sucking the life out of us. Not only does she not contribute to the household (chores, bills, or otherwise) but she does work and all her money goes to gambling. She’s a serious spender and my wife has resolved credit card debt for her as well as given her a fresh slate to start saving for retirement again(because traditionally, chinese children were the parents’ retirement account) However, I’ve refused to fund her gambling addiction and I’ve refused to pay any gambling debt for her. This apparently outrages her and she tells all her coworkers that her son in law is a cheap@ss. All this time, subsidizing her living is draining our accounts and saving up to buy our first place took significantly longer.
Enough is enough, I’ve found a new place to move into, my wife is totally sick of her mother, and we’ve decided to move on. Her mother can still be a major pain in the @ss, a vacuum to my wallet, and a dismal display of human nature but at least she wont be living with me anymore.
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Advice
2 Responses to “not so newlyweds anymore!”
Congratulations to you for standing your ground! I too have a Chinese MIL (evil old troll, evil, evil evil!) so I understand the culture thing (ridiculous!) and your pain and endless irritation. It is downright awful and they feel sooooo entitled!
I wish you much happiness in your new, sans MIL home. I hope you can ship her butt back to China! I would if I could! I just hope my old bat MIL and stupid FIL will kick the bucket soon! At least they are old and not living with me. I’d kill myself if they were!
Hi !
I always thought the Chinese son was the parent’s retirement account. By marrying the daughter, you have freed her from her parental responsibility. You have done a good thing for your wife!!
No matter what, your MIL is abusive, good thing you dumped her. You need to live your own life and be happy with your new wife. Ignore the MIL! She has a job and friends, she can take care of herself.
My MIL would do the same thing to me, if I let her get away with it. So I say NO a lot, and just forget all about anything she tries to get me to do.
My evil MIL can just hurry up and die, I hope the sooner the better.
Let your MIL go live with all the people that she has been complaining about you to. They will find out that she is poison and a parasite.
If she acts crazy again, then talk about having her put in a mental asylum, or a nursing home, or a homeless shelter. You have been nice too long, nasty is much more fun!