Mother-in-Law HELL

My fiance have been together for 1 1/2 years. Right after we decided to move in together I decided to cook him his favorite food (lobster). Now im a pretty good cook just as long as I have a cook book.  I had gotten almost everything cooked except the lobsters (they had to broil for 5 minutes) and I didnt know how to broil something (yes I can be a ditz sometimes) and so he insisted on asking his mom. He calls her and when she answers he puts her on speaker phone where then she proceeds to say “oh honey is she learning how to cook and not doing a good job?” my response was yelled into the phone “I KNOW how to cook!” and I figured out how to broil them myself. (she never cooked for him either!)
Soon after we found out we were pregnant which put us in a bad financial situation she insisted on helping us out because she always wants to help.  But she told us the only way she would help was if we moved in with her! I said no. The reason? She has 50+ cats! They inbreed! And pee on everything, including the stove top! And then she wouldnt clean up after them!
My fiance then decided to join the military to make sure we were finacially stable.  His mom didnt like this and kept trying to get him to change his mind and said she knew how to fix it, just get a good job! (Wow why hadnt we thought of that?!)
Eventually she lost her job and instead of looking for another one she took off and met up with a guy who became her “sugar daddy”.  This is when she kept pushing that she was still going to help us out. We were on the verge of getting a loan to cover all of our expenses while he was away. She kept saying there was no need and she would cover everything.
When the time came for her to actually start helping she said she didnt have the money because she and her sugar daddy broke up (he didnt want to pay for everything while she say around doing nothing). We said fine and broke our lease and moved in with his brother. (luckily we both had saved up some money)
as I got closer to my due date she kept saying she wanted to be here when the baby was born and would understand if I didnt want her in the room with me.  Why would I want anyone (other than my fiance) to be in there with me? When it came down to it she couldnt come down anyway because she didnt have any money. Not a shock.
Then she started trying to guilt trip my fiance into going up there (8 hour drive) to see his whole family and he kept saying we couldnt afford for him to take off work that much time from work (she wanted us to be up there for about a week for christmas) and she took that as it was my fault for him not agreeing to go.  So she begins to call and text me saying she knows he would really like to go up there to see the whole family and that I need to go because he wont go without me. I told her we couldnt afford it and she said she would pay for everything (yeah sure).  I ended up asking him why his mom wouldnt leave me alone about it and he said none of that was true that he had already told her we werent going up there because he didnt want out infant daughter to fly so young and we werent driving with an infant and four year old (I have a daughter from a previous relationship).
His whole family then came down for thankgiving where AGAIN she tried pressuring me into going up there for christmas.  Thankfully I had recently learned that my grandparents would be down for christmas so she finally accepted that answer.
After everyone was down for thanksgiving she kept asking if my daughter had gotten fat yet.  Every time she asked it made me mad and finally after repeatedly asking my fiance if she was fat he told her to quit saying that because she wasnt fat and wouldnt get fat (she is a healthy baby and got my jeans of having skinny little legs and arms and i have been told by the dr that she is perfect).
fast forward to the time my fiance is to leave for boot camp (he did the delayed entry program so he could see our daughters birth) and everyone knew when he was set to leave.  He had known for 3-4 months as did everyone else. His mom was insistant on being here the weekend before he left and seeing him off.  Everyone rearranged their schedules to see her and when its the week of her supposed arrival she says she cant make it because she doesnt have the money! Again she knew MONTHS in advance! She lives with a friends RENT FREE and has no payments except two car payments.  She threw her house payment on her future son in law (that is where he is living) and has TWO full time jobs!  Later on she calls her other son (the one were living with) and starts yelling at him that its his fault she doesnt have the money to come down!
The day came for him to leave and I stayed with him all the way until he left for the airport. Then he called me from the airport letting me know he made it safely and would call again soon.  I let his family know this and his mom got real jealous and wanted the number so she could call him back (I told her no it was from a pay phone and he was sharing with a bunch of people…really it was a recruiters phone). Then when I got the 2 AM phone call saying he had made it to boot camp safely she got jealous again and thought he was going to call her too!
Then she kept texting me in the middle of the night that night to see if I was awake and how she couldnt sleep and she was real worried. I on the other hand was TRYING to sleep.
She started throwing herself a pity party about the whole thing by posting on myspace (yes she has a myspace and I added her so she could see updated pics of the girls) how she was real upset about him leaving and she wasnt sure about all of this and how her baby boy left and she wasnt sure about him leaving.
Since he left I started writing him letters so when I got his address I could send them all at once and hed get a bunch.  For some unknown reason I shared this with his mom and she had the nerve to tell me “make sure you only send positive letters, we dont want to stress him out while hes at boot camp”!!!
Then she kept asking if I had heard anything from him yet and I said no not yet and she proceeded to ask me if he was upset that she wasnt there to see him off.  Being the nice person I am I didnt want to hurt her feelings so I told her “he didnt say but you know how he is” and she took that as he doesnt talk to me!  For the ENTIRE day (no joke!) she kept saying how he always talked to her (yeah him talking to her consisted of her calling and not stop talking so he would set the phone down and go about his business) and that she hadnt been around the two of us together enough to be able to read him on how he communicates with me. I tried convincing her that no he did talk to me and we have a very good relationship.
The next day I got letters from him so I let his whole family know and she decided to call me and keep me on the phone for an hour (remember I have a 2 month old and a 4 year old) telling me all sorts of family stories and then before she hangs up gets AGAIN gets into getting him to talk to me!
Three days after recieving the letters from him she gets all upset that he hasnt written her back (he doesnt know her address and said he only wants to write me and his family will have to deal with it). Then she asks me on a sunday if I got another letter from him. Mail doesnt come on sundays!!!
She also will text me saying “how are MY girls?” and will call and text in the middle of the night while im trying to sleep (it wakes me up every time because im a light sleeper) and “I need more pictures!!!” (I send her a picture of the girls once a week and Ive sent videos of them!).
However I have found humor while my fiance is away.  Now when she asks “how are MY girls?” I reply with “I dont know why dont you call your daughters and ask them?” and now for fun I will set up one of my daughters baby dolls and cover it with a blanket and send it to her to see if she notices and sometimes just squish a bunch of blankets together to make it look like something might be under it and take a picture. when she responds with “I dont see the baby” I say “what do you mean you dont see her?” which then she will actually say “oh I see her now!”  I will also call her in the middle of the night “just to chat”. But to top it off I send her texts reminding her to only send positive letters because we dont want to stress my fiance out while hes in boot camp”