My FMIL is extremely critical. She weighs about 90 pounds, is about 5 feet tall. I am about 120 pounds, five foot 6 and everytime I stick anything in my mouth she either looks at her daughter who is about 110 five foot 3 or makes some “hidden” facial expression. She is constantly criticizing my decisions on our wedding and she is OBSESSED with my registry. She looks at it multiple times a day and thinks it is “too expensive.” I took my mother (who is very cheap) to look at everything at my registry and she thought it was beautiful and took offense at my fmil’s comments. I don’t know what to do. She constantly tells my finance she does not feel “involved” in the wedding planning process but anytime I try to include her, nothing positive comes out of her mouth. My fiance makes me angry because he does not stick up for me and I have mentioned this many times. He has gotten better. I love him so much but I have considered calling the wedding off because of her. Nothing I do is good enough. My wedding is about a month away and I cry every time there is contact with her. Any advice about anything would be appreciated!
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Her name is Patricia. By day, she is Mrs. Corporate America, by night, she is an “Ann Landers” of sorts. Patricia is the founder of the wildly-popular website, Mother in Law Hell.
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4 Responses to “She Thinks I’m Spoiled”
Uhhh…honey, she isn’t supposed to be consulted about the wedding plans, so stop giving her info. Start learning the DIL habits of tuning out MIL’s whining complaints. Take no notice of her digs at your weight or shape, develop that thick skin and ignore her!
As for your registry, if people think they can’t cover your wish list, they will give you something just as nice or go in on it together……it is THEIR choice not your FMIL.
Congratulations to you and your intended.
Run! Run! Run! If your fiancee doesn’t stick up for you with his mom now, he never will, and you’ll end up, 15 years from now, resenting the he!! out of him for it! I’ve been there, done that, and am currently getting my ducks in a row to leave my momma’s boy DH in the dust, which is what I should have done 15 years ago at the altar!
Congratulations it’s a Mama’s BOY!
Why are you telling her anything about your wedding anyway? Is she paying for anything? No? Then stop telling her everything.
Eat whatever you want! You are not in any way overweight.
Oh, yeah. A lovely Momma’s Boy you have got.
If you are thinking about calling off the wedding because of this nutter and your fiancee’s non-support of your feelings and wishes, then you need to call off the wedding.
If your fiancee is willing to go into counseling over this, then both of you should go and get this noxious matter sorted out prior to getting married. It only will get worse after you are married. Although you cannot now think how — trust me — it will. Especially when any children come along.
Regarding your wedding, no wedding planning or manners book out there will instruct you to tell this troll anything — or involve her in any way. You pay for the wedding and accept no funds from her. She will see that as a ticket to ruin everything.
And regarding the registry, who the bloody cares what she thinks? Let her fret over it and respond with, “I am sorry you feel that way,” and tune her out. If small stuff like this is bothering you now, you are not going to be able to handle her after-marriage onslaught.
One last thought on the registry, if she complains, do a new registry, just for HER, and make it to Kmart or some other such place and put dollar items on it. That should shut her right up.