I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years now. Since the beginning of our relationship his mother has been awful.
Her first problem with me was that I am half East Indian. From there, it has only been downhill. She always has rude comments to make, snide remarks, and cant keep her mouth shut.
I have been nothing but polite and quiet around her. She makes me feel uncomfortable by the way she treats her son, my boyfriend. She is never sweet, and is always critical, and judgmental.
I am a senior in college, work full time and my boyfriend and I plan to get engaged after I graduate. However, I am getting scared of getting married to him with her around. I know they say you marry the family when you marry the one you love. The rest of his family is great.
He is almost 30 and growing up. I dont think she can let go and is selfish.
He has tried talking to her about us getting engaged and she just says shut up and stop talking about it (with choice words thrown in).
I feel helpless. I have tried and tried. I dont feel like I should have to do anything to get her approval.
I would greatly appreciate some advice. Thank you!!
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5 Responses to “Crazy Mother in Law, not married yet, kind of scared :(”
Honey, I feel for you…I recently got engaged, and I despise my FMIL. She has been nothing but rude to me from the get go…her basis? I do not have a bachelors degree!! I guess that defines me as a person!!
First of all you don’t marry the family only East Indians marry the whole family, it is a cultural thing, and next you sound rude yourself. Go away when she is talking with her son. She is allowed to not like you. Get it that she does not want you to marry her son. It is going to be hard to marry her son when she does not want you in the family. There are alot of families that do not like the daughter or the son. Get over yourself.
First off, I am not rude Kat. I am a very polite young lady that has a crazy mother in law. People meet her and are shocked by her. They cannot believe someone is actually like this in real life. So I will not get over myself. I think your advice has nothing to do with my situation. P.S. Don’t be giving advice if it is rude or hurtful, that only shows how unhappy or insecure you are with yourself. Thanks.
Hey
I know how you feel sweetie. I have a FMIL just like yours it seems and then some – what with the family following suit in her emotions. My best advice is this: Be direct, to the point, and if she starts giving you grief then just leave. If she can’t control her temper then that is her problem to deal with. You need to worry about your future husband and yourself. Once you are married, he is your focus as you should be his. All other opinions about anything come second (or third or fourth ha ha where ever you put them). It won’t be easy. Mine can be very cold. In fact she stopped talking to my fiance once he moved into the same town with me. I don’t know why some mothers are like this, BUT you can be better when you have kids down the road with your spouse. Just love your man and don’t let her walk all over you. You come first in your future fiances life – not his mom.
Wow, who dragged the “Kat” in?
Frankie you appear FAR from rude. Your FMIL has decided not to like you and trust me, she wont like anyone her baby boy brings home. Is your future hubby supportive of you? Do you think he will stand by your side when his mom gets nuts? If not, re think the situation cuss if he takes mommy’s side, you are in for a long bitter mess.